She Saw Him
by RiddleWrappedInAnEnigma
Summary: The first time Merlin saw Gwaine, most of his face was obscured by the tankard of ale he was in the middle of drinking. Not exactly an uncommon occurrence in a tavern, so the event would have passed by without a second thought... but then he went and winked at her. Fem!Merlin/Gwaine, no Merthur.


**AN: First off, I'd like to say that I am an American, so I apologize if any of the spelling differences between the US and the UK bothers anyone.**

**Secondly, this is pure Gwerlin. In this universe, Arthur isn't the slightest bit attracted to Merlin- he only thinks of her as the annoying little sister he never had. The same goes for Merlin- Arthur is the protective older brother who won't hesitate to poke fun at her, but won't let anyone else.**

**Thirdly, there isn't much dialogue in this story, just overall summaries of what happens in the episodes. If you are interested in a story where Merlin is a girl and the full dialogue of the show is included, I would recommend The Golden Effect by KhaleesiStormborn (it's a Merthur, with some one-sided Gwerlin).**

**Fourthly, (and I didn't think this AN would get this long), there are mentions of rape in this chapter. There's nothing explicit, and no rape actually occurs, but I don't want anyone to be blindsided by it.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the TV show Merlin or any of the characters.**

The first time Merlin saw Gwaine, most of his face was obscured by the tankard of ale he was in the middle of drinking. Not exactly an uncommon occurrence in a tavern, so the event would have passed by without a second thought... but then he went and _winked_ at her. Merlin had been so surprised that her own ale had gone down wrong and left her a spluttering, choking mess as she gasped for air.

Arthur, of course, had to laugh at her and loudly declare her apparent incompetence at the simple task of drinking, embarrassing her further. Unable to look either of the men in the eye, she kept her own eyes trained on a gouge in the wood of the table in front of her.

_Hopefully,_ she mused as she continued to cough, _everyone, including the dark-haired stranger, will think the color in my cheeks is from the choking, and not in any way related to that _wink. _And thanks to Arthur, everyone in the tavern will probably believe that the choking is because of incompetence, not from shock that any man would show even the slightest bit of attraction to me. _

It wasn't that she thought she was unattractive- no, it was more that she thought there were plenty of other girls out there who were even better looking than she was. After all, she spent a lot of time with Morgana and Gwen, both of whom were beautiful women.

But, back to the matter at hand... she had finally managed to breath properly without feeling that burning sensation in her throat, and tried to discretely glance up at the stranger through her black hair- some of which must have fallen out of the plait she kept it in during her coughing fit. Unfortunately for her, the stranger was staring at her with an amused look on his face.

_Damn_.

After being caught, Merlin decided to keep her attention on the table, or Arthur, or... the rather intimidating looking man who had just walked into the tavern.

Which soon led to the third time Merlin saw Gwaine- when he introduced himself in the middle of the brawl, winked at her _again_, and proceeded to throw himself back into the fray.

The fourth time Merlin saw Gwaine- and here she realized that she should probably stop keeping count, even if it was only a passing thought- was when he had passed out on the floor with a dagger stuck in his leg. And of course, Arthur being the noble and honorable man that he was, declared that Gwaine would be taken back to Camelot with them so that he could be treated by Gaius.

On the way back, Merlin couldn't help but let her mind wander as she thought about how roguish Gwaine looked with his stubble, how handsome he had looked when he had tossed his head to get the hair out of his eyes when he introduced himself, how attractive that half-smile was...

Gwaine was still unconscious when Merlin had left Gaius' chambers to go to the market in the Lower Town in order to fetch some kind of herb Gaius needed for some kind of remedy for some Lady... she hadn't really paid much attention to the particulars, all she knew was that she had been given leave to go to the market- something she rarely had much time to do.

And since she was there... well, there was no harm in looking around and browsing the wares, was there?

She must have been wandering around for longer than she thought, because the next thing she knew, a small purple flower had been thrust in front of her face, stopping her in her tracks.

And so Gwaine proceeded to flatter her by calling her Princess Merlin, and embarrass her as he kept bowing. She was pretty sure her cheeks were permanently stained red by the end of their encounter.

As he walked away (backwards, smiling at her), she brushed the flower tucked into her hair lightly and smiled back at him.

_If you're not careful, you'll fall for him. And you know you'll fall hard._

But would that be so bad?

Merlin couldn't really help it- every time she saw Gwaine, a little more of her fell for him. He was handsome, charming, funny, and that roguish attitude of his... not to mention all of the shameless flirting he would do. Even when he was drunk, even when polishing the boots of the entire army...

And when he came in at just the right moment, when the men posing as Sir Ethan and Sir Oswald had managed to rip her top slightly as they pawed at her...

She had been examining the large crystal on Sir Oswald's chest, and just when she realized that Sir Oswald wasn't actually Sir Oswald-

"Well, hello there. What's a pretty thing like you doing here?"

Shocked, Merlin fell backwards and scrambled away quickly. "I was just- I wanted- I thought you might be cold. This part of the castle can get rather chilly at night, and I thought you might need some more blankets, and-"

At this point, both men had gotten out of their respective beds and were standing over her as her back hit the wall.

"Did you hear that, Sir Ethan? She thought we were cold."

Sir Ethan's features twisted into a lecherous smile. "Well, if she's truly that concerned, I know of a better way of keeping us warm tonight, don't you?"

Merlin's eyes widened in horror. _Why_ didn't she let Gwaine look for those damn swords? This was every maidservants worst nightmare- no noble, especially the king, would ever think that the knights would do such a thing, and would accuse the woman of seducing the men. It wouldn't even occur to them to take the word of a servant over that of a knight-

Her thoughts were cut off when both men took a hold of one arm each and tossed her into the closest bed. She landed on her stomach and tried to get away, or at least put the bed between herself and her attackers, but they grabbed onto her legs before she could do much of anything. She kicked out at them, her panic overwhelming her as she desperately tried to do _something_, but with one man holding her legs down and the other one positioning himself on top of her and pinning her arms to the sheets, she wasn't really in a position to fight them off.

Finally, she managed to get a hold of herself enough to scream, and with tears in her eyes she watched as Sir Ethan's hand came down and smacked her so hard she could have sworn her neck cracked as it snapped so one side. She understood that it was supposed to be some kind of warning, to tell her to be quiet, but Merlin had never been someone who would go down without a fight, no matter how terrifying the situation. So she kept screaming, and thrashing, no matter how futile it seemed.

"Get her to shut up, will you Sir Oswald? That shrieking is really getting on my nerves."

It was at that point, where Sir Oswald had taken a hold of the neckline of her shirt and _pulled_, and Merlin was just about ready to toss both of them into the wall with her magic and damn the consequences, that Gwaine burst into the room. Unarmed, he didn't stop even for a moment as he tackled Sir Ethan, who hadn't had enough time to do much of anything, and hit his head on the floor hard enough to daze him momentarily. Gwaine immediately got up and lunged for Sir Oswald, but _he_ had had enough time to grab his sword and crawl to the other side of the bed. He swung in Gwaine's direction, just missing Merlin as she scrambled off the bed towards Sir Ethan's sword.

"Gwaine!"

He turned and caught the sword she tossed at him, spinning it expertly to block a thrust aimed at his chest. There were a few tense moments as their swords clashed, but then Gwaine spun his sword around Sir Oswald's in a move that managed to flip it up and out of Oswald's grip and land in Gwaine's waiting hand. He held both swords aimed at Oswald's chest, when the guards burst into the room.

Naturally, the two knights-who-weren't-knights lied and claimed that Gwaine had attacked them in their own chambers for no apparent reason, while Gwaine cursed them and tried to explain what had really happened. Once Arthur heard his version of events, his eyes narrowed in anger and confusion. The Sir Oswald _he _knew would _never_ force a woman, but Gwaine had proven himself to be an honorable man, (albeit a reckless one, after all he _did _start a tavern brawl earlier that day), and so neither account was making sense in his mind. So he did the only thing he felt he _could_ do- he tried to get his father to reconsider executing Gwaine, which he did, but Uther banished him.

As Gwaine packed his belongings, Merlin stood by and watched guiltily. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "You were right, I shouldn't have gone in there. I should have waited until later, or figured out some way to expose the swords before the mêlée, or-"

Gwaine cut her off. "Don't worry about it, Merlin. I know what can happen to pretty young maidens who are at the mercy of nobles, and I should have known that those two were that sort of brute. I shouldn't have let you go in the first place."

That tugged a smile out of her. "Well, you didn't exactly _let _me do anything, I left without your approval."

Gwaine chuckled a bit at that. "You certainly are a stubborn woman, Merlin." He smiled wistfully at her. "Don't ever change," he whispered, his fingers coming up to brush against her cheek.

Merlin closed her eyes briefly at the sensation and held his hand to her face. She looked up into his eyes, and could see the regret swirling in their depths- a regret that she knew was visible in her own. There had been a spark between them, one that they might not be able to explore now that he was banished.

Gwaine sighed and pulled his hand away, both of them aching slightly at the loss. "I would ask you if you'd like to come with me, but-"

"But you know my place is here, in Camelot... it's my destiny. I can't just-"

He silenced her with a light kiss. He pulled away far enough to rest their foreheads together, and held her face gently in his hands, both of them standing there with their eyes closed. "And I wouldn't ask for you to give up your home for the wandering life- your life is here, not crossing over the whole Five Kingdoms looking for adventure."

She snorted a little at that last bit. "Why would I need to go looking for adventure? We get plenty of excitement here _without_ trying to seek it out."

He couldn't help but smile at that, pulling away and opening his eyes. He watched as her own fluttered open, then gave her a wink as he grabbed his stuff and headed for the door. Once there, he paused and turned. "Make sure you look after Arthur. He's in danger."

Merlin's eyes narrowed in playful suspicion. "I thought you hated nobles?"

"Well, maybe that one's worth dying for, eh?"

And with that, Gwaine walked away. He didn't particularly like goodbyes, even though he never really stayed in one place long enough to have anyone to say goodbye _to_, but all the same...

The next time Merlin saw Gwaine, she didn't recognize him. After all, he was only one among more than a score of knights decked out in full armor, so it would have been close to impossible to find him, even if she had known he was there. It wasn't until she saw a knight disarm one of the imposters in the same manner he had disarmed Sir Oswald that she realized who he was. And in the excitement of the mêlée, she didn't really have time to think about how that made her feel.

And as Merlin and Gwaine waited outside the council chambers while Arthur and Uther discussed Gwaine's fate, she didn't get the chance to examine her feelings much either. Both of them seemed almost... embarrassed at the position they found themselves in. Their last parting had seemed so _final_ emotionally that neither was entirely sure how to act. Luckily the awkward situation didn't last for very long, with Arthur coming out after only a few minutes to tell them that Uther wouldn't be swayed from the banishment.

And so Gwaine left once more, while Merlin and Arthur watched him leave from the battlements. Merlin thought that would be the last time she saw him, and a small part of her heart shrank away at the thought.

**AN: I feel like I was getting a bit overly descriptive or overly poetic in certain parts here (especially this last paragraph), but I couldn't stop my fingers from typing! I'd love to know what you thought!**


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